Rounders, Inc.

I stumbled across a nice poem written by the father of a professional poker player that is a friend of a friend that sums up my beliefs. I hope you enjoy it!

The Universe Conspired to Help

The man had a dream

He knew what he wanted, it seems

Once he was sure in his heart this was it

He vowed someday that he would achieve it

He wasn’t quite ready to do his thing

But he felt fairly certain what the

future would bring

When one day the time was right

When he was ready to fight the good fight

He conquered all his excuses and set forth

To take the risk-fraught first step

without any remorse

Once he took the first step down the line

The universe conspired to help make sure

he was fine

He never dreamed he would accomplish so much

That the universe would give him such

incredible luck

Now older and wiser he understood the hardest part

Was convincing himself that it was time to start

-Phil Hellmuth

I was playing the $200 - $500 No Limit Hold ‘Em game at MGM Grand Detroit the other night.

Seat 1 is a loose player and makes it $25 to go pre-flop. Seat 3 had not played a hand in two hours. He min-raises to $50. Getting two-to-one on my money, I call from seat 9.

Pre-flop, I put seat 1 on nothing significant and seat 3 on A-Q. I have 4-5 off on the button.

The flop comes A-3-5 rainbow.

Seat 1 bets out $50. Seat 3 min-raises to $100. I call and seat 1 folds.

At this point, I know I am beat by the ace, but I have 9 outs to make two pair, trip fives, or a straight. Plus, I am getting three-to-one on my money.

Fourth street is a 6.

I now have an open ended straight draw and four more outs. Half the deck.

Seat 3 bets out another $100. I call with 13 outs and now four-to-one on my money.

Fifth street is a 7. Seat 3 bets out $100. I raise him all in for another $150.

He calls.

Before he shows his cards, I say “You have ace-queen. I have a straight.”

He shows the A-Q and begins a 30 minute commentary on how me being in the hand, on the button, with a loose player and a good read on the tight player was a donkey move.

If taking down an $1100 pot with a $50 pre-flop investment and 13 outs is a donkey move, then hee haw baby!

I am a level-headed player. Big wins don’t excite me and bad beats don’t anger me. I go full-on tilt when someone either does a hit-and-run or slowrolls me. Given a choice, I prefer the hit-and-run.

Last night, I am under the gun with A-Q off. I make it $10 to go and get 8 callers.

With $90 in the pot and a flop of Qc-6c-3d, I bet $90.

Three players fold, the next player goes all in for $143, and the table folded around to me.

I call and show.

The player says “You are good so far.”

Turn is another 6 and the river is a deuce.

The player, with cards still face down and the hand over, starts talking to the woman next to him. She apparently folded a 6 and had second-thoughts about folding middle pair on the flop.

And we wait, and wait, and wait for the conversation to end.

Then he shows A-A.

Squarely in my sights for the rest of the session, I make it my one and only goal to felt him in retaliation for the slowroll.

Next time, don’t slowroll me bro.

I am at MGM Grand Detroit the other night. There was a guy with a deep stack of about $900 in seat 6.

I am in seat 9 listening to seat 7 and seat 10 talk about how you need to have quads or better to win at this table because of the sick one and two-outers this guy is hitting on the river.

Sure enough, for the next two hours, his chip stack doubles - all from one and two-outers on the river.

The first playable hand I get is pocket Queens. I flop quads and double up. I don’t see another playable hand for an hour, so I leave and head over to MotorCity Casino.

At MotorCity, I sit down to a table of familiar faces. The lady to my right is a solid player at a table of loose players.

She makes a comment about the only way you can win at this table is to have quads or better. And, as it turns out, the only hands she has won at this table were quads.

An hour into this session, this person hits quads. Again.

Two hours into the session, I have not had a single playable hand. As I am thinking about calling it a night, I get dealt pocket Queens.

The Quads lady is in the hand to my right and to my left is a notoriously loose player.

The flop comes A-2-2 with two spades. The lady is first to act and checks.

I immediately put her on 2-2, given her track record on this night. I ask her “why did you check?” before betting out $50.

Mr. Loose calls, and Ms. Quads calls.

The flop is a Queen. Ms. Quads bets $100. I ask her if she has quads already, then I call.

Mr. Loose folds.

The flop is the case Queen. Ms. Quads checks. I make a value bet of $50. Truth be told, I hoped she had A-A or 2-2. The Bad Beat Jackpot at MotorCity pays on Aces full of Jacks or better getting beat as long as both hole cards play. Quads over quads would have paid out about $40,000.

Instead of a bad beat, it was bad news: she asked me if she could see one card. “No, not tonight” was my reply.

“Should I call or fold?” she asks me.

“If you have pocket Aces or pocket deuces, then call. Otherwise, fold”, I reply.

She calls and shows a dry Ace.

Two playable  hands at two casinos in four hours happens to be quad Queens.

What are the odds?

I was involved in the largest pot of the night in my last session. Unfortunately.

There was a tight, experienced player at the table that stayed out of my pots for several hours. We played together before, and I think there was mutual respect. Besides, I had position on him.

All of a sudden, he moves to an open seat that gave him position on me. I figured he was changing gears since I was the chip leader at the table. He was second in chips, which was half of my deep stack.

The first hand in his new seat, I get dealt K-K. I make it $25 to go. He calls and we are heads up.

Flop is 4-4-3. I make it $75 to go in a feeble attempt to take down the pot right there.

He raises me another $200, and instantly pulls his jacket over his face to completely cover up. This guy turned into an instant statue.

I tell him I think he has a strong ace or maybe pocket queens.

I start my process of elimination on hands he does not have.

I tell him he does not have A-A.

I tell him he does not have pocket fours.

I also say that I have pocket kings.

I ask the rhetorical question of having pocket threes. I rule this out because I did not think he would call $25 pre-flop with 3-3. Then again, I have not seen him risk half his chips in any pot since he sat down three hours ago.

I ponder the situation for another minute, then I act against my gut. My gut says K-K is not worth another $125 or more.

Thinking he is trying to make a move, I put him all in.

He insta-calls, but does not show.

Knowing I probably need either a king or a four, the turn and river are blanks.

The player slow rolls pocket threes for a full house: threes full of fours.

In retrospect, he got a miracle flop and was trying to protect a marginal boat.

While I don’t like the slow roll, I do respect the move.

Now, if I could have folded my brokeback cowboys on the flop …